Friday, May 27, 2011

Feeling Sexy

Let's be honest, a big part of why I dress is that it makes me feel sexy as all hell. No I should be clear on this before there's any confusion. I explained before in a blog last year that dressing for me is not a sexual act. Something being sexual and feeling sexy is not the same thing. Most of us feel sexy after a good haircut, but that doesn't mean we get off on the sound of clippers. So realize I'm not talking sexual act, just feeling sexy.

Photo by my wife Laura

I don't know if this is the case for other dressers, but for me at least it's actually much easier to feel sexy as a woman than as a man. I think that has quite a bit to do with the fact that it's much easier for me to act sexy as a woman. As a basically heterosexual man I have a much clearer idea in my mind of what women do that I find sexy, which makes it easier to build from that knowledge. Trying to be sexy as a guy is... difficult. In fact to be honest there doesn't seem to be any real technique to being a sexy guy, it feels like you either have it or you don't. Most guys who try to act sexy end up looking goofy or like douche bags... or both.

Women (and therefore anybody dressed as one) have a whole bag of tricks ranging from certain walks and flips of the hair to breathy whispers and tight clothing. There's a whole spectrum of sex appeal for women to use, and unless they come off as awkward or unconfident when they do any of these things they almost always work. Guys... not so much. Aside from massive muscles (which doesn't do it for everybody anyways) the common theme with "sexy" guys seems to be that it comes effortlessly. That is down right impossible to mimic if you don't just have it.

So while I don't think I'm an awkward male I rarely feel like a sexy one because it's never been clear what I could do to be sexy. As a woman though I know what things I can do, and granted they can be over the top at times but it just makes me feel sexy. That's a wonderful feeling and it's one I get much more easily in dress.

Friday, May 20, 2011

Crossdressing Tips for Beginners #2: Lipstick

Well I might actually live up to a promise for once and keep these coming semi-regularly. This was a second take. I had wanted to get this up last week but the first time recording I really didn't like how it turned out. Much happier with this one. That said I didn't realize until I rewatched it for the second or third time how loud Tiki and Lula (the family parakeets) were squawking in the background on a few parts. Oh well. As before this is not a detailed tutorial or a how-to, it's just some general tips I think some might find helpful.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Returning to Pride... Let the Panic Set In

I'm happy to announce that I've been booked to perform at this year's VT Pride in Burlington on 7/23. I was privelaged enough to be able to perform two numbers at last year's pride and have been hoping I'd get to go back and do it all over again. I don't know yet if I'll get to do one or two numbers, but I want to do at least one brand new piece... and that's where I'm running into trouble.

When I found out that I was booked for the show I thought coming up with a new piece would be easy: I just had to pick one of the pieces I'd been thinking about but never got around to doing when I was in NYC. The problem is that these dormant ideas fall into one of four categories. The first are numbers that simply aren't appropriate to the venue. This is a public show in a park and needs to be kept to PG-13, so any overly risque numbers are out. Then there's pieces that would be too elaborate for what I want to accomplish (requiring too many props or a set, etc.) Next are numbers that I really want to do as multi-person pieces, things I wish I'd been able to do with Switch N Play before I moved. Finally there's numbers that require costumes that I don't own and can't afford to buy in the time I have.

Relaxing before my first number at last year's Pride. Photo by Laura.

This last category is the most frustrating. There's a bridal number I've thought about doing for a while, but I don't have any part of the outfit. I don't even own white heels. While I wouldn't go out and buy an actual wedding dress, even putting together semblance of one requires many items and those costs add up.

I'm probably going to have to try to find a new song or two work with also, as all the songs I've been going over keep giving me ideas that fall into one of the previously mentioned categories. I'm sure I'll come up with something. I've got over two months, and I'm already excited!

The only sad note is that since she'll be neck deep into directing a play Laura won't be able to join me this year. Having her there was a big part of the fun last time. She hasn't gotten to see me perform as much as I would like and she took some great pictures and video last time. It won't be quite the same without her.

Friday, May 13, 2011

Arrrrrrgh Matey!

It's been quite a while since I did art modeling. I actually haven't done it since I posed for Betty Spaghetti's School of Art and Debauchery and that was long enough ago that I'm having a hard time remembering what year it was. So getting to pose at the White River Junction, VT branch of Dr. Sketchy's was a wonderful night for me. The theme was "Pirates of the Connecticut" inspired by the upcoming release of the new "Pirates of the Caribbean" film.

I got to pose with a gentleman by the name of Ben Tolosa who was all done up like the one and only Captain Jack Sparrow. I wasn't meant to be anybody in particular but that gave me a little more freedom in my costume. It's almost embarassing that I happened to have the bandana, cutlass and replica vintage pistol just laying around the house. I'm a geek, what else can I say?

All of these are by the same artist, Barb Stender. I'm hoping to get to see some of the other sketches done that night and there will be pictures later. Those may not go up here but you can keep an eye on my flickr page. I want to thank Miss Phoebe for hosting a great night. I hope to get to go back and do it again. If I was a bit closer I'd probably be going even on the nights I wasn't posing. If anybody is in the area or even in a comutable distance I recommend checking it out on future nights.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Meet My Daughter

Yes it's true, my wife and I are having a baby. It's something we've been trying to make work for a while so we're extremely excited. We found out the gender on Sunday. There's a decent chance that this may be one of the only times I put up photos of her in this blog. I try to keep my daily life and drag life fairly seperate, it just makes things easier for me that way. I have no intention of hiding this side of myself from my child. However until she's old enough to say to me "I don't mind if you talk about me in your drag blog" then I would consider it a violation of her privacy to do so. Sure I've put up pictures of myself and my wife here, but she's given me permission to do so, a baby can't do that.

However I still wanted to share this bit of excitement with everybody. I may bring up any ins and outs of being a dresser with a child as I see fit, we're still figuring out how to handle the whole notion. As I said it's not something I'd want to hide from her because I don't feel it's something to be ashamed of and she shouldn't think that either. But as with so many things, it's not her I'm worried about, it's everybody else. How do you explain to a child that it's perfectly ok that daddy plays dress up likea girl but that it's better that she not tell her friends? Well I don't have the answer to that, so we'll have to figure it out as we go along.

Oh and while I'm not ready to share the name we've chosen here... I will say this: it means "great queen." Go figure right?

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Crossdressing Tips for Beginners #1

I've been thinking about doing this for a while. When I first started dressing myself I didn't have a great deal of guidance or help. I had to learn what I now know mostly through trial and error. I eventually got a handle on things and now I get questions from others who are starting out and looking for some advice. Now I'm not an expert in make-up or fashion, but I just wanted to share what's worked for me in the hope that it will help some of you out there. So with that in mind this first entry covers foundation. I'll try to have this be a bi-weekly thing.