Saturday, July 30, 2011

Early Feminine Influences

I've talked a little bit about influences before but that was in relation to performance not in terms of my dressing in general. As I've said before there wasn't any sudden revelation about wanting to dress as a woman, however there is a moment I can pin-point where I took notice of femininity in a way I hadn't before. Many dressers can name a movie or tv show or singer who sparked somthing in them. Well I have a movie moment that in hindsight did have an impact on me, though I'm not sure I realized much about it at the time.

The film is "Who Framed Roger Rabbit," and the moment is the introduction of Jessica Rabbit. Anybody who's seen the film no doubt knows exactly what I'm talking about. But to be sure we're on the same page here's the scene:


Now this movie came out before I'd hit puberty so the sexual overtones of the scene were somewhat lost on me for a few years. However there are things about Jessica that did strike me even at the time. The character is obviously an exaggeration in terms of a woman's body, namely the size of the bust and those insane hips. However there's one thing that keeps this moment from being exploitive, and that is fact that she holds all the power. From the instant she steps out from behind that curtain she not only has everybody's attention but she is completely dominating the room. The men may hoot and hollar but there's never any question that she is in control of everything going on, she can lure and man in and then cut him down with just a glance. Seeing the power of femininity in that moment is something that has stuck with me... plus I'll admit that I tried to emulate that hip swivel at an young age just trying to figure out the logistics of it (somewhat to my mother's dismay at the time.)
It's funny the moments that make up how I've chosen to express myself as a woman. They're things that I have to really think about to uncover, but now looking back I can see and appreciated how much these moments shaped the woman I try to be. I would never say that moment suddenly made me want to dress as a woman, but when I started to develope that part of myself moments like this did influence my perceptions and choices. You never know what's going to shape you until years later. Funny how that plays out.

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